I went to bed last night before 10pm, barely able to keep my eyelids open. I woke up this morning, and although I contemplated popping a couple of Advil, I refrained, and opted instead for some delicious coffee. I got to work this morning in the first day of the new year where it even "felt" like it was below zero, realizing I was only wearing a light coat because I hadn't checked the weather in my groggy haze. I'm a little tired, but I finally made it to Day 4.
It's been a rough start to the new year, the plan, and sticking to it. The phrase "1 step forward, 2 steps back" moderately begins to describe it, but I'm finally getting into routine.
I don't know what it is that has made this so hard. Is it the fear of "Week 2" and all its sore muscles, tired eyelids, grumbling stomachs, and no-turning-back-now-ness that keep me continuously reverting back to "Week 1"? Is it the finalization of not being able to let go of a decade of moderate lethargy with only minor consequences that, although only mildly fulfilling is still comfortable and cozy? Is it the fear of becoming a social laggard, as I greatly reduce or completely obliterate some of the things in my daily life which I use to relate to others? Probably a little of each, I suppose. Or, part of my demonstrated pattern of self-sabotage and procrastination.... that too...
Nevertheless, I continue on, proud that I made it to Day 4 (kept getting stuck at Day 3), and hoping it's all downhill to Day 5, and then to Week 2, and then beyond!
